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‘Date with Dad’ is a unique program in the U.S. that allows incarcerated fathers to have a “dad-daughter dance” in jail, giving them a chance to bond with their daughters. Directed by Angela Patton and Natalie Rae, the documentary Daughters follows four different girls as they prepare for the rare opportunity to meet their fathers in a Washington, D.C. jail and share a special day of dancing, chatting, eating, and bonding.
The event may be called “Date with Dad,” but as the documentary title suggests, it is all about the daughters. The program was created to empower young Black girls and provide them with an opportunity to build a relationship with their fathers. In the days leading up to the dance, trained professionals host healing circles with the daughters and their mothers or guardians, helping them navigate their emotions and understand the significance of the special meeting. Similarly, the fathers in prison participate in counseling sessions, where they discuss and open up about their relationships with their children. These sessions prepare them emotionally and mentally for the dance and the eventual parting.
Daughters explores the complex emotions young girls experience when their father is incarcerated—hurt, abandonment, betrayal, resentment, and other strong feelings. Filmed over several years, the documentary shows the impact the “Date with Dad” program has on its participants, which is cathartic and life-changing for many. Interestingly, the filmmakers never reveal the nature of the crimes the fathers are imprisoned for; however, as a viewer, it feels secondary – this is not about the dads. The brief afternoon of dancing and bonding is meant for the girls to have a chance to express their feelings and connect with their fathers. It’s for the girls who wish to have a relationship with their dad, and it also gives the incarcerated men a glimpse of how giving up a life of crime to focus on providing a stable home could transform their family’s world.
“Take three breaths, and then we will say ‘I will see you later.’ If you say ‘bye,’ it means you’re never seeing them again,” says five-year-old Aubrey to her father when it’s time to leave. She is one of the youngest participants the documentary focuses on. Initially, she is extremely excited to meet her father—asking him to lift her multiple times, dancing with joy, and weeping when it’s time to part. The filmmakers revisit her a few years later, when she is eight, as she gets to meet her father for the first time in three years. This time, she shows little interest in the reunion and even asks to leave early. Though there is no commentary in the documentary, it’s clear how, as children grow older, they can lose interest in maintaining a bond with an absent parent.
Daughters is a poignant documentary that highlights the beautiful bond between fathers and daughters and how much parents mean to their children.
Watch the documentary on Netflix.
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