By Sumith Jhawar (Twitter | Instagram)

“Rocky aur Rani ki Prem Kahaani” is:

  • Overly long, just like its title
  • Jarringly loud and flashy
  • Overloaded with clichés and stereotypes
  • Full of throwback songs and dud originals

The movie feels like a medley of social commentary reels, where every major problem finds a childishly simplistic solution.  

A considerable amount of money is spent on opulence, trying to make every frame look picture-perfect, which is not what movie-goers want to see today. Karan Johar still expects the audience to come to cinemas to escape reality, which does hold true for some, but his cinematic universe is a lazy la-la-land that will put you to sleep. No wonder people still use the term ‘Bollywood’ as an adjective synonymous with over-the-top melodrama.  

Picture this: An akhada, where an anniversary is to be celebrated, turns into a wedding-venue style place with matching wedding clothes and synchronized dancing, just for a song. An Anurag Kashyap or Anubhav Sinha could’ve probably made an entire movie just on that track’s budget.

Things like cheating are supposed to be seen as cute just because two old people are doing it, and there are quite a few ‘kids, close your eyes’ scenes, making it unsuitable as an out-and-out family movie.  Alia Bhatt is the only non-stereotypical character who does a good job, while Ranveer Singh is the annoying polar opposite.

I would recommend you watch “Afwaah” on Netflix instead.

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