For a good one week I did not log in to my Facebook account for the fear of coming across something dreadful like the Anaconda number by Nicki Minaj some friend had shared. Well that is obviously not the only reason, but just saying. And now, let’s proceed to what this post is really about – bizarre songs of the eighties. The eighties were a crazy time for music, the artists were probably more experimental than any other decade and came out with the weirdest stuff ever. And despite the bizarre music videos that accompanied them, they were still sort of singable!

So here are my top three music videos of the eighties that were just plain bizarre and you might have already heard them because they were all chart-busters during their time.

1. Relax – Frankie Goes to Hollywood

Picture stolen from Wikipedia

I first heard this song in the movie “The Proposal” which stars Sandra Bullock who has left her Congeniality days far behind to do awesome movies like the Gravity. But coming back to “The Proposal”. the situation they use the song in was just bloody apt! If you have seen the movie you probably remember that Sandra Bullock is to marry Ryan Reynolds and the old ladies in the house decide to throw a bachelor party for Miss Bullock. So we have a strange stripper dude who is wearing, umm, a butler’s clothes?  And he makes his entry on to the stage to the very charming lyrics which go like this –

“Relax don’t do it
When you want to go to it
Relax don’t do it
When you want to come
Relax don’t do it
When you want to come
When you want to come”

That is when you realize that the song is actually super catchy and well, totally a stripper song! Soon the stripper is swinging his butt in front of a cringing Sandra Bullock and while the scene is hilarious, the song definitely stays in your head. But nothing in the movie prepares you for the original music video which was banned in the U.S. Me and a friend were watching the video, and believe me when I say that both of us went “what the fuck!” at least three times as we watched the video! We were laughing, cringing and then singing. The song is replete with sexual undertones, with people randomly holding bananas, there is a old fat naked dude with shaving foam on his face, and what not (there is a tiger too)! While I can go on and on about the bizarre video I will probably just put it here for those who have not seen it yet!

That is definitely a video I am not watching again, but the song, well I will be listening to it now and then for a long time to come. After watching the video, which obviously had certain homosexual undertones too, I understand why it was banned, but I also understand why it was one of the biggest hit of the decade in the U.K. And if you do not like the song either, well, relax don’t hear it!

2. Whip It – Devo

So I am watching a movie called “Raising Helen” and by the end of it, I feel like it was a really long ad for the band called “Devo”, a band I had never heard of before. So you get to know about this great one hit wonder when Kate Hudson the lead actor in the movie, gifts her sister what looks like collapsible red Tupperware bowls along with a CD of the band Devo. But oh no! They are hats. And I guess they have something to with the band devo, because soon they are wearing it and dancing to the song which sounded to me like “Grab that whip”!

The only decent screenshot I could take from the movie with those legendary red hats.

And the happy Birthday message to the elder sister is “Remember, you are never too old to dance in your underwear”. Soon, the entire family is brandishing imaginary whips and dancing to the Devo song. And the original video does not betray its lyrics either. So not very shockingly, the music video starts with the lead singer emerging out a wooden cottage, brandishing a whip and the red hat while he begins crooning:

“Crack that whip
Give the past the slip
Step on a crack
Break your momma’s back
When a problem comes along
You must whip it
Before the cream sits out too long
You must whip it
When something’s going wrong
You must whip it”

Some really random inspiring stuff huh?. For some reason there is a oriental chick in the video, with a squint eye, who claps while the dude in tight black shorts cracks his whip around. And for inexplicable reasons the dude is torturing a chick with really dark red lipstick slapped on. The video just does not make any sense, and then you get the epiphany – things do not need to make sense to click with the masses. So again, you have to watch this bizarre video for yourself and maybe “whip it good!”

3. She Drives Me Crazy – Fine Young Cannibals

First of all, hats off to whoever thought up that fine name for the band. I came across the song in youtube and honestly, I did not understand most of what the singer is singing. His voice is too husky and its like he is blowing the wind. The video starts off with what looks like two dudes, one in completely black and the other in white (formal dresses), playing hopscotch! Yes, HOPSCOTCH! Watch if for yourself and tell me if I am wrong. And soon enough the lead singer comes in the frame and someone throws water on him and he starts singing with water dripping on his face. That is the only sexy wet stuff in the video.

The only part I could understand was the bit from the chorus where the dude sings –

“She drives me crazy and I can’t help myself”

The most brilliant and random part of the song is where for some brief three seconds two women in what looks like combat clothes fight. I think Madonna was inspired for her “Die another day” from this song! And as I continue watching the video, I am waiting for them to show whoever is the girl that drives him crazy, but you never get to see any such girl. Unless he is referring to the dudes who keep playing hopscotch in the entire song while the lead singer pastes his face so close to the camera, you are scared he will come out of it. Or if he is referring to the weird women.

One youtube user probably understood the unending pain and curiosity of those wondering who the hell is the dude talking about and decided to end the suspense – the song apparently is about the Queen of England. Of-course.

This song is not even very catchy, the lead singer is not funny, but the video is definitely bizarre. And while I may not like the song much, it topped the charts in Australia, Canada, Spain and U.S. and had even hit the number one spot in the U.S Billboard. There are definitely more songs from the eighties which are way weirder than the stuff that I have chosen to write about, but that is because I have probably not seen them yet. And well to end the post, I will leave you with the video of “She drives me crazy”